Daniel's frist prayer

Today at breakfast Daniel decided he wanted to pray. It was very sweet:

"Jesus, I don't know you, don't know what I say. Thank you mom make breakfast. Thank you (for) Cosette. Ok, bye."

It's a beginning.

Father, would you reveal yourself to Daniel, help him learn to know you and want to talk with you.

Conversation with Daniel

Daniel “Why you choose my name, Daniel?”

Mom “It’s a very special name, your grandpa and uncle both have the name Daniel. We knew you needed a special name because you are a special boy.”

Daniel “Momma, why you go China to get me?”

Mom “Because you were in China”

Daniel “Why you choose me mommy?”

Mom “I love you”

Daniel “Why you love me?”

Mom “I’m your mom.”

Daniel “Why you my mom?”
Mom “Because I adopted you.”

Daniel “Why you adopt me?”

Mom “Because I wanted a son and God said ‘adopt Daniel’”

Daniel “Why God say adopt Daniel?”

Mom “He wanted you to have a family.”

Daniel “Why you go China.”
Mom “Because I love China and I love YOU!”

Daniel “Why you love China?”
Mom “Because YOU and Cosette are from China.”
Daniel “Cosette no from China, Daniel from China.”
Mom “Yes, you and Cosette were both born in China.”

Daniel “What is born?”

Mom “When you come out of your birth mommy’s tummy, that’s being born.”

Daniel “Out of tummy? How?”

Mom –not ready to answer the next question, or series of questions “Sweetheart, God made mommies tummies so they can have babies in them. Now, I think it’s time to go pick up your room.”

Life with a curious little boy.

Tonya

Mothers say 2009

5:30 a.m. - dreaming, fast asleep... drip, drip, drip. Hand on face... I'm wet, look at hand -- alarmed I'm bleeding... no that's not it, becoming more conscious of, um... oh it's a boy standing over my face, HE is bleeding! Yikes – I’m up. The boy quietly says "um momma, happy mom's day, I have bloody nose."

The day got better, I promise. John and the kids took me out to brunch at my favorite Italian place, Birraporetti’s. I’m not sure what was best; the delicious food, the live jazz and the wonderful company.

At one point during lunch Daniel told me he "really really loves mommy." I asked him what he loves about mommy and he said "I love his heart". Made me laugh (the grammar) and cry both. Then he asked me what I loved about him so I said a bunch of things, "I love your heart, I love your eyes, I love your laugh, I love your ears." etc. When I acted like I was done he would say "more mommy, what more?" so I went on, "I love your nose, I love your voice, I love how funny you are, I love your toes, I love how kind you are..." He wouldn't let me stop. He craves that love and still doesn't believe it’s his. He still needed convincing.

Thanks for following along,
Tonya

Daniel’s 7th birthday

We had a family party for Daniel yesterday. We did our best to incorporate his American favorites; fast cars, hamburgers, ice cream and cake. Normal party fare.

Daniel had fun anticipating the part all week. He squealed and giggled all week, while he asked questions trying to figure out exactly what might happen. He insisted that I make a party hat for him. We talked about his cake; first I showed him pictures of a couple of Cosette’s cakes over the years to give him some ideas. First he declared he wanted a swing set cake. I started my research, not at all sure how to make a 3D swing set. Thankfully he changed his mind. Next he wanted a police car, and finally he settled a race car cake. You can see the results here.


The evening started with torrential rains, the kind of rain that causes flash flooding here in Texas. As the guests arrived John and I were quietly keeping an eye on our back porch which has a history of collecting water and has flooded into our family room several times over the past two decades that we have in this house. We knew that the trench in the side yard was growing over and the water might have trouble finding its way around the house.

Daniel was grandly introduced by one guest. He was having such fun being the focus of attention. I have two extremely extroverted kiddos who thrive on the attention of others. As more guests arrived the energy built higher and higher. Of course there were periodic “presents now momma?” Very sweet.

John came inside with the hamburgers, prayed and started the buffet line while Guta (BIL) and I went outside with a shovel and umbrella. Guta re-dug the trench while I held the umbrella; trying unsuccessfully to keep us both dry. Thankfully the crisis was averted and most of the guests were unaware.


Finally it was time for presents so Daniel started ripping into them. He was kind and thankful; articulate and polite; all mixed up with a lot of excitement. I felt very proud of our little man.

Cosette had a difficult time sharing the focus of attention that had always in the past been hers in the past. She played host; greeting guests at the door, reading Daniel’s cards for him and serving the cake.

Overall I believe Daniel felt loved and celebrated, and that was the goal.

Enjoy the slide show. It includes spring soft ball, open house, the Fort Worth Zoo, Spring Break (Glen Rose), JP's birthday, Easter, Gateway’s V! Roundup, Dallas Arboretum, and finally Daniel's birthday.

Tonya

7.5 months... I love spell test mom!

“I love spell test mom! I really really love spell test. Look, I know spell test mom, I know. You show daddy I know spell test!”

He was so proud of himself as he displayed his perfect score on his spelling test today. I’m incredibly proud too. It has been struggle, learning the phonics needed to really know how to spell these words. Up until recently he would memorize the shapes of the letters and regurgitate them, but not in the right order and he didn’t have a clue what they meant. After months of hard work on everyone’s part, especially his, he actually got all the words right today AND he knew what sounds related to what letters AND what the word meant. Amazing little guy!

Come on 1st grade, we are ready for you now!

Proud mom,
Tonya

No More Homework!

Yesterday after school Daniel decided he wasn't going to do any more homework. When I asked him why he thought that would be okay he responded with "my know English" very emphatically. I told him how proud I am of his English progress but that 'yes' he did still have to do homework and he was devastated.

If only life were that easy sweetheart!

~ T ~

I love mommy

I wanted to share that recently Daniel has started saying "I love mommy" a lot lately. He will pause for my reply "Wo ai ne Daniel" (I love Daniel). They he says "No, I really REALLY love mommy" with the emphasis on the second really and a tight hug around my neck. Makes a mothers heart very, VERY happy! He is such a tender and loving little boy who has brought so much joy to our lives.

On a more difficult note, he has recently been telling us about some violence that he witnessed in his foster home. It's quite disturbing, but I'm so glad he is feeling safe enough to tell us. The amazing thing is that Daniel does not seem to be aggressive at all. He has never displayed any aggression at school and when he fights with his sister it's verbal, not physical. What a testimony to God's grace that he did not normalize the violence he saw at home and become violent himself.

Daniel had the flu last week, so the topic of being sick, germs, hospitals, etc. came up quite a few times. During one conversation, he was trying to tell me something and I was not understanding so I asked him to draw me a picture. He drew an arm with an IV in the hand and shots going into his arm. He pointed and said "Daniel's arm." When I asked him if he was very sick he said "Oh, Tung guo (China) say no talk about sick." And that was that. He refused to say another word. It seemed clear to me he was told not to tell us about being sick. I think he forgot at first and then remembered and stopped abruptly.

I am currently searching for a play therapist with international adoption experience. Thus far I'm not having much luck. Karyn Purvis (The Connected Child) lives and works here in the Dallas metroplex but she has a two year waiting list AND you have to be in crisis to even be considered. Daniel is not in crisis. My goal of course is to avoid crisis. Any local recommendations would be appreciated.

Tonya